Residence in decline.

As I type this, this greasy shit-ball of disease is laying in front of the door at my last apartment. After I moved out, a friend of mine moved in. Apparently, he hasn't done a damn thing to maintain the level of safety that I once provided.



Don't get me wrong, though, this isn't the same classification as the normal shit-rat that I once rained death and destruction upon in the name of child welfare. No, this a problem of a much grander scale. Standard pellet guns don't do squat to a raccoon unless you were to get real, real lucky. I suggested a golf club. He called animal control.

I guess the point is I'm ashamed and embarrassed by my friend's behavior(or lack thereof). In only 7 months, the neighborhood that I once secured has apparently turned into some sort of shit-sanctuary. When the cats away...

1st Twins Game

It took a while, but I finally made it to a game at the new Twins stadium. Besides it's name and the fact that most of it is beige, there really isn't anything about this place that is bad. And the food!





Below is what you see when you look up...

What in the HELL!?!?

OK, I was going to try to ignore this incident in the name of freedom of expression or whatever, but really... what in the HELL?


*i'll explain the weed plant later...

This was the scene outside our doorstep at 12:01 on easter sunday. Its an old Russian Orthodox Church. I understand that the day is special to these particular believers as well as others, but what about the dude across the street who might be sleeping and couldn't give a flying fuck about said day?

Well, "Fuck him" say they. But they don't say as much with a whimper. Oh no, that would be more characteristic to their approach on, well, helping humanity progress forward. Instead, they do it in a swashbuckling, gay Megatron-ish, give-us-your-attention-and-prepare-to-burn-in-Hell fashion... and its complete with 15+ minutes of the loudest goddamn bells I've ever bore witness to. Incense, fire, walking around in fucking circles like well dressed zombies, terrible singing... its all there.

Now to the weed plant. Its just a marker that I stuck there(DUH!). Its sole purpose is to call your attention to the dude being pointed at by the bottom left leaf. I was going to go with an arrow or a circle, but somehow the weed plant seemed more appropriate. Here is that scene enlarged a bit...



This guy(who was of some goddamn importance in this fruit-fest) wouldn't stop murmuring shit and jumping around like an idiot. Also, the hands? Those fucking hands? What is with your goddamn hands, dude? As you can see, he has them up in the air either like he is doing the chicken dance or he's in a mosh pit.** I honestly have no idea what the fuck was with this guy. Well, at least he has a handful of impressionable kids around him. Jesus...


**i do believe this is the first time that the chicken dance and a mosh pit were used to describe the same thing.

The Classic NE Auto Show.

As stated before, I never intended for this project to be about cars. But, like Mr. Leahy said... "When life throws you shit-balls, you've got to get a shit-bat".