Lucas Arts Portraits

more portraits from the party.

Lucas Arts Portraits

This is almost everyone who I knew at the party in San Fran. I was glad to have the opportunity to get them all in the same place over the course of the night.

Waxin' Jedi

I've been getting SO many requests for a photo of myself in one of my famous light saber locks, so...



Oh, and if you're wondering who won this, well, I'm writing now so I guess, um, she's dead.

Lucas Arts Party...cont.

more from the party.

The Wombat/Abominable Snowman Thing

I got to attend the Lucas Arts Christmas Party on Saturday. Even without this guy, it was one of the best parties I ever went to. Matt wasn't sure if this guy was hired, or if it was an employee that just went all out. Either way, the Wombat went nonstop.

SF, Friday night.

We went to a place in SF called the Elk's Club last night. Its a private club, but they open it up on Fridays to the public. Even their elevator was cool.



Ate at a restaurant call Katana-Ya. Sushi and Ramen.

Sausalito, CA

I'm staying in Sausalito again for part of my bi-yearly trip to the bay area. MattO's apartment... what a spectacular porch and view.



My absolute favorite place in Sausalito is the No Name Bar. Its a tourist town during the day, no doubt. At about 6:30 when the last ferry leaves back to San Francisco, the town seems to become something else entirely. I'd have to say this bar can sum up how I feel about this area as well as anything.

Mafia/NRA night. Part 5.

and more.






It was fun. Lets do it again.

Mafia/NRA night. Part 4.

more.

Mafia/NRA night. Part 3.

St. Petersberg restaurant and vodka bar. Lesson learned... don't get coffee flavored vodka in your White Russian.

Mafia/NRA night. Part 2.

I wish I could start every night out at the range.

Mafia/NRA night.

Mike Haug organized the first annual Mafia/NRA party last night. At least 15 people showed up at Bill's Gun Shop in full dress to shoot pistols and look like players. After that it was on to the Russian vodka bar. I took a ton of shots and got a handful of good ones, and I promise to anyone that I promised to last night that they will be in circulation, and I will be putting some of them on this blog.

This is all I can offer up for now as it seems somewhat fitting.

Cory

I took this a few weeks ago, but I decided I couldn't rob my 2 viewers of it. This is the kind of shit I have to wake up to. Send help.

Akeley, MN

Out of respect for Cory, I didn't shoot any of the red shit-bats that were running around his land.



That couldn't stop a guy from dreaming, though.

Cory, maybe YOU should move to San Francisco... save some squirrels or something...

Halloween, '08

Without a doubt, my favorite day of the year. Its more important to me now that Christmas, Easter, New Years, and whatever other holiday you can think of, combined. The only one that comes close is Thanksgiving, cause I like turkey. We made it happen this year.

A REAL American

I'm not going to go so far as to condone the actual consumption of one of this dude's pies, but I like his style no less. Actually consuming a squirrel, as tempting as that sounds, may be dangerous.



Think about it. If everything you eat becomes part of you, then eating one of these pies would make you part mongrel shit-bat. Thank you, but no thank you, Mr. America.

Shit-Rat Shit-i-Cane

Seems that I have officially won the battle for my territories. Taken the hill, so to speak. That nasty red prick from a few weeks ago came back last week. Seems that I need to calibrate the sights on my smoke-wagon. Anyway, he came back, threatened me and my 91 year old grandmother, and proceeded to get capped in the dome one early monday morning. The kids can play outside again.



Look at this fucker! Thats right, not only are they horribly evil, vicious, and without souls...but they're drunks, too! I advise leaving the occasional open liquor around your yard. Apparently, the pricks have no off switch when it comes to drinking. As much as I hate the idea of them catching a decent buzz before they get alcohol poisoning, in the end they'll be dead and thats the goal.

Again, the following picture is there as a warning to you ALL! The goddamn shit-rats are PREPARING FOR WAR! We need to be ready.

Dead Men Walking

Doing it right on the Zombie Pub Crawl.

And another...

OK, so maybe this is all I have going for me. Squirrels. They are my nemesis. Today, that red one that I THOUGHT I did away with was back again. He no longer goes for his old hiding spot, but he's around. I can't get a clean shot at him, though! I have kids running around the neighborhood, so I have to be careful. Like Axel Rose says, "Just a little patience...yaaa yaa.....".


DOES THIS LOOK CUDDLY TO YOU?!

Also, someone sent me a write-up of this bullshit native-american idea of how squirrels in your life can tell you about yourself or some ridiculous crap. The only thing that shit-rats in my life means is that I'm not doing my part. So, I re-wrote it and sent it back to her. I'd attach the original, but who fucking cares.


This is my updated, 2008 version.

The grey shit-rat is the most common, vile, and the most enthusiastic. Like all shit-rats, it does not hibernate, nor does it feel emotion. It builds its nest in the hollows of trees, in tree tops, or by Satan's right hand. The nest are usually nuclear missile-shaped, and the entrance is on the side(near the dead human baby skulls). Even though it is bigger than the red, if confronted the grey will usually run and avoid any fight. This allows the grey ample time to premeditate the violent death that it will rain down upon the red(usually while the red is sleeping or feeding its young). Its predominant predators are the foxes, Kelly, and raptors such as the owl and the hawk. Gray shit-rats, like the red shit-rat, usually have 2 litters per year(OH MY FUCKING GAWD SOMETHING NEEDS TO BE DONE!!!), and as long as they have a steady supply of human blood and bone marrow, they also are usually able to be on their own in about 12 weeks.

All shit-rats can be quite sociable, and homicidal. The wrestle, steal, and kill for play, and the are extremely observant and imitative. They are terrorists and they build bombs. The imitation of the other shit-rats is how they learn. Individuals with shit-rat totems learn best by doing evil deeds rather than by studying Godly deeds.

Shit-rats are also quite communicative. Their screams of horror can often be heard in the trees when disturbed, playing, or chewing on human infant faces. Their bushy tail, while making foolish humans think they are something other than a rat, adds to their expressiveness along with providing warmth, shade, balance, and a place to stash a homemade shank. The shit-rat will often express its one emotion, carnal hatred, through flicks of its tail..

Every shit-rat has rabies and is unique, and its medicine will be activated differently for everyone. IF A SHIT-RAT HAS SCAMPERED INTO YOUR LIFE, EXAMINE YOUR OWN ACTIVITY AND PREPAREDNESS(Do I have enough ammo? Are my sights on?). ARE YOU TOO ACTIVE? NOT ACTIVE ENOUGH? ARE YOU NOT PLANNING AT ALL FOR YOUR FUTURE, DISTANT OR NEAR?(I need to get up earlier, because that is when they are most active.) ARE YOU BECOMING TO ERRATIC-RUNNING TO AND FRO AND NOT ACCOMPLISHING ANYTHING?(Yeah, but what the fuck does that have to do with a shit-rat?) DO YOU NEED TO LEARN HOW TO SAVE AND RATION ON ANY LEVEL-INCLUDING MONEY, TIME, ENERGY, SHIT-RAT HIDES, ECT.?ARE YOU AFRAID YOU WILL NEVER HAVE ENOUGH SHIT-RAT HEAD-SHOTS?(Absolutely) ARE YOU GETTING TO HUNG UP ON COLLECTING AND ACCUMULATING? ARE YOU GATHERING AND NOT GIVING?(Whatever...)

Shit-rats can't teach us jack shit. If we are too soft, shit-rats may appear to help us. Shit-rats are the masters at preparing the apocalypse, but they also are reminders that in our quest for our goals, we should always make time to socialize, play, and feed on the weak and sick. Work and play go hand in hand, or the work will create problems and become more difficult and less fruitless. Shit-rats like fruit. Everyone run out and get a new pellet gun, we will take back our city!




Like W said in his infinite fucking wisdom..."LET'S ROLL!"

#12

OK, so this isn't the exact squirrel that I marked this morning, but its a pic of its relative. I don't mean for my blog to become a library of dead shit-rats, but hey, its a war. I stalked this prick out of my window from the moment I woke up this morning. I'm still using my old gun, but hey. As Rumsfeld said(in his infinite knowledge) 'You go to war with the army that you have, not the army that you want'.

These little bastards are MEAN! They're QUICK! NASTY! They will KILL you're children. Much worse than the hated, dirty standard-ass grey squirrels. We, as humans, need to come together to take as many of these out as possible.

Anyway, the yard is clear of vermin, again, for the time being.

It takes a village to smoke some squirrels!

This is #11.

At this point in the year, it had been so long since I've seen a shit-rat in my yard that, well, I guess I had started to wonder where they all went. I see them everywhere else... just not in my yard. I guess you could say that in a strange way that I don't understand, I even started to miss them.

Then came Squeaky. I think I'll call him that since I heard him doing that annoying shit-rat squeak. I believe he is the one terrorizing my neighbors roof. WAS the one, that is. I saw him crossing from their yard, and had just enough time to lock and load.



I will take this time to pay some respect to Squeaky... he was a tough son o' bitch. The first shot hit the mark, and he scrambled into the tree, obviously facing the end. I don't want to torture squirrels, nor do I want them to suffer... I just want them to die. That being the case, I went to reload to finish him off. This fucker did not go down quietly it took 5 MORE SHOTS to finish him. Props, Squeaky. Next time, you're brethren may be looking down the barrel of this smoke-wagon.

What happens at Fusebox...

Stays at Fusebox.

And on the internet.

Backyard Terrorists.

I've effectively won the battle against the squirrels in my backard.  I haven't seen one for some time now, and I'm getting itchy.

The photos above are the same.  At first glance, one would probably not notice the problem in the wider of the two photos.  These fuckin garden-munchers have extremely good camoflauge.  They are also patient and can sit extremely still for long periods of time causing people to look right past them.  But their strength may be their weakness, because if I ever catch them eating my neighbors garden goods, I'm going to take extra time and extra careful aim and eliminate the problem.

As of yet, they haven't given me any reason to do them in.  But I am a good neighbor.  I will be watching.