Monday, July 27, 2009

The battle rages on...

I'll have to sit on the porch during the day and watch movies more often! I assumed that the fuckers would hang low on a hot, sunny day like this. So, so wrong, Kelly. So wrong.



This dude took one epic ride to his demise. I caught him crossing from one tree to another. I didn't see him fall, but I sure as hell heard it! He hit my neighbors moving truck right on the cab. It sounded like some sort of super shit gong. BONG! It was all I could do to sit there for a while and act like I didn't just get another bitchin' kill, but I had to put the gun away and be cool... just in case. Then he crawled to damn near the exact middle of the street and died... very Wild West like little buddy!

A little while later I got a lock on another one. Couldn't pull the trigger, though, because 2 women were walking down the sidewalk. Here is the fucked up part of this shit story, though. When they saw the squirrel, they called him by NAME!(skuggins or smuggins or schluggins... who cares, right?). Then they fucking asked him what he was doing hanging out by a tree that wasn't his! Oh my god, it seems like I have some serious work to do on the PR side, as well as with the body count. Whatever though, cause I'm an uncle now and I do this shit for the kids.

2 comments:

eric said...

battle?!?! more like hitler rolling into poland. it's not a battle if one side doesn't fight back- that's just a slaughter.

Kelly said...

so what you're saying is that these squirrels are POLISH?!?! my god, this problem is worse than i imagined...